what a great place to visit oh what a great place to visit but When i am here i cant see very clear
air pollution it is blocking be from seeing very clear and I need to wear a mask to stop it getting into my body i think that they should stop using factories that use air pollution and also try to make the factories have a place where all the air pollution goes and then have a chemical to dissolve it Oh how i wish that there was no air pollution
what do you think off my poem.
hope you enjoyed reading my poem!!
what do you think off my poem.
hope you enjoyed reading my poem!!
Kia Ora Jonathon,
ReplyDeleteI like your overall ideas and intention, and I think you've worked very hard to make a good effort. I think you can put more effort into this post and make it look like a poem. Maybe you can add different paragraphs and full stops. I like how you said you want a chemical to dissolve the factories pollution, so I think it deserves to be heard. I also wish that pollution would stop, so we can both work hard and try our best efforts.
Make sure you correct the mistakes and use grammar wisely.
Happy Blogging
Gargee HPS
hpsgargeej.blogspot.co.nz